living the burn with a burned out clutch

I came out of my house yesterday and there was my car. where i had left it on monday... (i rode my bike all day tuesday)... it was parked on 4th street showered in gifts!
on the windshield was a $61 parking ticket for street cleaning the day before when i hadnt moved it. and the entire side of the car was coated in filthy, sewage smelling water that was in a puddle next to the car... obviously all day/night cars had been zooming by and splashing this nasty nasty water all over the side of the car.

well... i chose to just take it with a grain of salt... get in the car and drive to teach my first private that morning. En route up to the palisades my car started driving really weird. revving super high in each gear and not picking up speed. SO, i just turned up my music (the burning man soundtrack i made that includes our awesome fire gazebo bronski beat song)... drowning out the revving sound and i just breathed through my mouth as i sang really loud, so i wouldnt have to smell the nasty sewage water on my car.

I got to teach and was a few minutes early, so i just hosed off the car, but it actually didnt help for some reason. oh well.

then i left there and drove to my second private client. This time, i barely got there. My car was not even barely moving. This particular client prefers me to teach breathing and guided meditation, so of course as i was leading him through, i was really speaking to myself.
Guiding him to energetically release and surrender anything that was happening that was out of his control, because what is the point of trying to resist or push against the universe? there's no stopping that sucker and it will just exhaust you...
and of course my favorite thing to remind people... "if we are resisting, we are experiencing a lack of ease... and what is a lack of ease, but DIS-EASE... so really, when we reisist and fight, we are just bringing disease into our lives"...

So after leading my client, but really leading mySELF through releasing and surrendering to the universe's plans.... i left and got back in my car.

i had to call my friend and let him know that i wouldn't be able to drive to his meditation class that i promised i would go to and started to feel really guilty and bummed out that i was bailing on him, but quickly reminded myself that the universe has a plan and i just have to roll with it and embrace it!

SO, i decided i needed to go to my mechanic. Of course i broke down on the way, but hey! at least i was on my way there. So, as i sat there on the side of the road in culver city starting to freak out waiting for the tow truck, i just had this OVERWHELMING sense of the playa at burning man.
and its like all the weight lifted off my shoulders and i just smiled.
all the questions of "why am i in this mess?" "why did i break down HERE" they were all so clear.

At burning man you never question why am i here? why did i take THIS route? because everywhere you go there is some amazing art installation or something that you look at and go WOW! i am so happy that the universe sent me in this direction... or else i might have missed this beautiful piece of art.

WELL... isnt the default world exactly the same? ALthough, the beautiful gifts along the way aren't shiny art installations, but moments in time alone, or weird tow truck drivers.
But isnt that a gift too? just like wandering upon a metal nest full of mosaic eggs made out of mirror.... i wandered upon donald, the tattooed, grumpy tow truck driver.

Donald arrived to tow me and there i was sitting in a meditation with a great big smile on my face. HE kept looking at me like i was either some hippie on drugs or maybe just slightly mentally retarded. WHO SMILES when they have a broken down car that smells like burning rubber and sewage and at least a grand in repairs, and is sitting on the side of some shady road in culver city? obviously someone who is remembering that this is ALL A GIFT! this is my art installation i wandered upon.

I told Donald all about how mercury has been in retrograde (and what that meant.. since he was looking at me like i was speaking chinese)... and how that is why he has had so much business. etc etc. and honestly, at first he was like, oh my god! why did i have to pick up the weird hippie chick, and by the end, he had turned his thug rap down and was so interested in what i was saying and was so excited to tell his friends at the tow place that they could plan ahead for next time mercury goes retrograde and know that business would be crazy busy and plan for it.

Then i get to the mechanic and again, i am ALL smiles. totally positive and happy and realizing that whatever happens is perfect. if i've blown my transmission, i would just have to get a new car.. and THAT would be my phoenix rising from the ashes... and if it was just the clutch burning out, i would be so lucky and just have a new clutch!
and the best part of all is that i hadnt eaten anything all day and as Donald was driving me up Washington blvd i saw we passed "leaf" the awesome raw foods restaurant.
SO, as soon as i dropped my car i had a lovely little walk about a mile down the road and treated myself to an AWESOME lunch at leaf.

NOTHING about this seemingly "shitty" day was shitty. I totally loved every moment of it.
Alex came and picked me up and took me to work and then i got to walk home while chatting to my mom for the whole half hour walk. it was awesome. AND.. it WAS just the clutch... AND i thought a new clutch would be 1500 and its only 850!

This is just ONE example of a day when the realizations and epiphanies i got at burning man were put into effect and i just rose above all these things in life that would have gotten me down in my old life and now, i just see them as this awesome gift... how BORING would life be without my cosmic art installations in the form of sewage water, and Donald, and burned out clutches?

Life is beautiful and i love every minute here in it.